Jim Wegryn presents

A Full of Words

— A Look at American Word Humor —

Situational Oxymora

e think of an oxymoron as two words that contradict each other, either literally or figuratively. But sometimes an event or situation can contain a contradiction, either in a real sense or just in the language. The sentence describing such a thing is what I call a situational oxymoron. Here are a few examples.

…the optimist who carries an umbrella.

…the “No Smoking” sign in McDonald’s.

…the soccer mom driving an SUV.

…a TV concert with closed-captions.

…a priest offering marital advice.

…a traffic jam on a expressway.

…the comic strip “Mary Worth.”

…a rose colored sink. (“sink” as in sinking feeling)

…pants that breath easily.

…a pacifist wearing socks.

…a blind man saying, “I see what you mean.”

…a noble count who is bad at math.

…someone who owns an exercise machine and a riding mower.

…a person prone to long walks.

…a ham operator who is a vegetarian (or an orthodox Jew).

…a soldier trained to be a medic.

…an army of foot soldiers.

…the army infantry made up of adults.

…a dermatologist who gives rash advice.

(Also see The Best Oxymora List.)